The Magnificent Seven: Complete Series (1998–2000)

It doesn't take place before or after the existing films. It's its own thing in terms of both tone and continuity. And the men are all new, with the possible exception being Chris Larabee (Michael Biehn), clearly a small screen version of Chris Adams, the leader of the seven as first portrayed by Yul Brynner in the films; although the TV version of Chris is rightfully his own man, too, not a carbon copy of movie Chris.

With it being an ongoing series it made sense to localise the group, to give them a single town from which to operate, with the added benefit that it would provide a place that we as viewers can also form an attachment to. Although not always operating within the parameters of established law, the Seven nevertheless become the town's unofficial protectors. The unique skills that each man has is put to good use for its betterment; e.g. one is a healer, one an ex-preacher, etc.

Most of the time they get on well with each other, but because they have such different temperaments and goals in life there are occasional internal conflicts. It's a credit to the writers that the men all remain likeable even when they're clearly doing something morally wrong (mostly that means Ezra Standish). In truth, there wasn't a single one of them that earned permanent derision, perhaps because collectively they represent feelings or failings that most of us will have experienced or struggled with at some point in our life - they're relatable.

A number of recurring secondary characters play an important role, often as a voice of conscience or a lure of the heart, deepening and/or complicating the determination to defend and preserve the town. Yes, that sometimes means romance, but it's not always as straightforward as that statement might imply.

Season Two introduces Robert Vaughn as a Judge; Vaughn was one of the actors in the first Magnificent Seven (1960) film, but he played a different character.

Ironically, every once in a while the only reason the townspeople were placed in danger was because the bad guy(s) had gone there in order to confront or kill the Seven! But that's just life, right? Even good deeds have consequences.

22 episodes, approx 60 mins each (the Pilot is 90 mins).

4 holes in the clouds out of 5

Sapphire and Steel (1979-82)

I saw it first when I was a kid. I don't remember what age exactly, but it blew my young mind. I saw some of it again in my twenties. It blew my mind once more. You can guess where this is going... yup, and again in my thirties, mind blown. During all that time I encountered nothing else quite like it, so in my experience it's unique.

Wikipedia notes that the show's creator, Peter J. Hammond, gave it the working title of The Time Menders; and while not as seductive or as pleasing to say as Sapphire and Steel, it does a better job at describing what the series is as a whole.

The enigmatic duo are 'operators' that fix time when it goes wrong or when parts of it leak or break through barriers into other parts. It's known that there are 127 operators in total, of which Sapphire (Joanna Lumley) and Steel (David McCallum) are two. Their full role is a mystery, but part of their job is to mend fractures that exist between temporal states; they're a line of defence, preventing the malicious side of past, present and future from destroying itself and everything within it. Time itself is described as a corridor that encompasses all things, so in a way the operators are like interdimensional hall monitors maintaining order.

Joanna Lumley is radiant and sympathetic as Sapphire, although she can paradoxically be sometimes cold and detached at the same time. David McCallum is austere and methodical as Steel. Yes, both are like their names, but I've often wondered if the names came first or if the personalities preceded them.

Stories (called 'assignments') are multi-part, so while there are 34 episodes in total there are only 6 assignments and it's best if you make time to watch all of one assignment in one sitting. Each assignment has a resolution but don't expect to have all questions answered. It's deliciously cryptic but not to the point of bafflement. The editing and use of sound are excellent, keeping events tense and flowing, always engaging and often eerie - at times even chilling.

I feel that the low budget actually works in the production's favour. The feeling that we're on a sound stage adds to the unsettling nature of the environments. It's almost as if for the duration of the assignment they've lost the intangible sense of safety that we unconsciously attribute to traditional notions of reality.

34 episodes, approx 25 minutes each.

5 side doors out of 5

Into the Labyrinth (1981-82)

Three youths, Phil, Helen and Terry (as pictured), shelter in a nearby cave when a freak storm breaks out. It's there that they find Rothgo, a formidable but weakened soul with the kind of powers we'd normally associate with sorcerers of bygone eras. He enlists the children's help to retrieve an ancient and powerful artefact.

To attain the Nidas, as it's known, the kids must venture into the Labyrinth, a gateway to other times. It's a perilous journey and like all good children's TV shows it has an antagonist that's truly memorable, but I'll get to her eventually.

It sounds like a standard set-up so far, but it has elements that raise it above the norm. Firstly, Rothgo, played by Ron Moody (who you may know better as Fagan in Oliver! (1968), Carol Reed's version of Oliver Twist) brings a Shakespearean sensibility to his scenes. Perhaps being limited to a stage-like setting was the reason or perhaps not - whatever the case, he helps turn what could've been an archetypal mentor character into an emotional one, desperate to save himself but likewise prepared to sacrifice his goal should the need arise.

While the search is ongoing from week to week, the structure is episodic. Both the Nidus and the children are bounced around notable historical periods, creating something akin to a merger of fantasy, sci-fi and period drama. Following them through time is a power-hungry witch named Belor who's hell-bent on attaining the artefact's power for herself, and if she can't have it then no one will.

The beautiful but evil Belor, a toxic yet alluring combination, was played by Pamela Salem. Wow - what an absolute star she was! Salem hammed it up in an immensely dramatic fashion when necessary but in such a way that she owned every scene. She embodied a collection of detestable traits but I was completely smitten by her enthusiasm and grace. Full marks for her.

Some folks will criticize the fact that the same cave interior is repeatedly used, over and over, rearranged or revamped a little each time with the application of new set dressings. It's a legitimate complaint but not one that I was at all bothered about. Like I said before, it was a stage-like environment, and that's how it works on stage. I even began to look forward to the changed trappings, evaluating their placement and usefulness. I was never disappointed.

21 episodes (07 Eps x 03 Series), approx 26 mins each.

4½ shining reflections out of 5

Bad Influence! (1992-96)

My first thought was, 'Who let Andy Crane out of the broom cupboard?', but he did an okay job on his feet, showing an admirable amount of enthusiasm in the presenter role. His co-host of the show is Violet Berlin, which is a name that most UK folks who were into gaming back in the 90s will recognise.

It wasn't as good as the similarly themed GamesMaster (1992-98) series that aired on a rival channel, but Bad Influence!'s focus was broader.

It states on Wiki that the show was like a 'Tomorrow's World' for kids, which is an observation I agree with. Of course, it means nothing if you don't already know what kind of a show Tomorrow's World was. In both cases, new technology that was either still under development, in the testing phase or already on the market was showcased in an easy to understand way that didn't compromise the scientific nature or importance of the product. Features were either in the studio or on location and showed the presenter(s) getting hands-on with the new tech.

The techy stuff was cool, but the main focus was Video Games, Consoles and Home Computers. By 1992 the 16 bit consoles had taken a strong hold, but CD-based options were appearing. It's fun to look back and see how things like the Panasonic branded '3DO Interactive Multiplayer' and the 'Phillips CD-i' were heralded as the next big thing, when in fact they were the next big failures.

Interestingly, product reviews even included third-party devices, such as the kind that enabled gamers to circumvent copy protection on cartridges, allowing for import carts to be played on UK machines. The friendly warning that the use of such gray area products voided your warranty seemed more like a necessary addition to keep the team on the right side of the law than anything else.

The competitions were mostly amazing; in one episode they even gave away a Neo Geo with games! In the UK at the time, a Neo Geo was like the Holy Grail - in fact, it was better, because you can't play Metal Slug on the Holy Grail.

57 episodes, approx 20 minutes each.

3 super-fast datablasts out of 5

Knightmare (1987–94)

As a young Faustus I loved all things fantasy and supernatural. Fighting Fantasy books, Dragonlance and Forgotten Realms novels, HeroQuest gaming sessions, etc, so it's no great surprise that Knightmare fit perfectly into my life.

Four adventurers (kids under 16) entered the Castle of Confusion in the hope of conquering its dungeon. One wore the Helmet of Justice, which limited what he/she could see, and entered the dungeon proper. The remaining three stayed behind to act as guides, able to see on a screen where their friend was, to direct and keep the Dungeoneer from falling into imaginary pits of doom and suchlike.

The rules of the game were overseen by Treguard the Dungeon Master, pictured above, a noble(ish) born Saxon, he would give occasional clues and hints to either help solve a puzzle or feed the team's nervousness. Treguard rocks!

Even though it was all for the children, the adults were the real stars. They treated the chroma key (blue screen) locations as a kind of stage, treading boards that weren't there as enthusiastically as they would if they actually did exist. In short, they were a theatre troupe doing what they do best: bringing theatrical life to an otherwise empty space. In addition, they had to ad lib when the kids turned out to be more stupid than they'd anticipated for, which was often. It's not unfair to say that some of the contestants hit every branch of the stupid tree when they fell.

Each year the dungeon would shift, offering new challenges and presenting new recurring characters. Even Trequard (Hugo Myatt) got himself an aide or two, my favourite being the elf Pickle (David Learner), who started out a little annoying but grew into a truly memorable part of the show in his second year.

The rules were unevenly enforced; it could be overly-harsh one minute and too forgiving the next, depending on how thick the kids were. It started out pandering to them, but soon got bored with that approach. In S3 the cast toyed with humiliating them, successfully, and in S4 the level design almost sent a few of the clumsier ones to the casualty ward. When a team who knew what they were doing featured, the show became the thing that it was envisioned to be: magical.

112 episodes, approx 25 minutes each.

4½ watchers of illusion out of 5

Transporter: The Series: Season 2 (2014)

Much changed between Season One and Two and not all of it’s good change. Frank’s attitude toward his job is the same—he’s still a practical, matter-of-fact guy with a plan that tends to go tits-up before the halfway point—but now he’s more like James Bond in how he goes about things. I suspect that behind the scenes someone actually said ‘Let’s make him more James Bond,’ and they did, unfortunately. The B-Movie charm that existed previously is compromised, replaced by a TV production with aspirations of being a secret agent movie.

There are personnel changes, too. Carla Valeri (Andrea Osvárt), the woman that functioned as a mysterious liaison between the transporter and the often shady customer, is replaced by the foxy Catarina Boldieu (Violante Placido).

Catarina does a similar job but she’s more active. Her multilingual skills are an asset to Frank, so he occasionally has a need for her to accompany him on jobs. Her role is well-defined and not shoehorned in if there's no need for her presence in the field. The chemistry between the pair is more interesting than it was with her predecessor. Of the changes made, she's the most successful.

As before, Inspector Tarconi (François Berléand) cameos from time to time.

There's a more global focus to the stories. Frank hops borders frequently, travelling to places like Libya and Belarus, coming into contact with regional gunmen all trained at The A-Team school of villainy and marksmanship.

Somehow, people do actually get killed and because we're now in dark, thuggish, modern Bond mode there's not always a happy ending.

It’s mostly stand-alone episodes, but the beginnings of an ongoing arc creeps in and a nemesis for Frank is highlighted. It feels a little forced but also shows a confidence in the material and a willingness to make things even more personal in the next season, if it isn't cancelled before then.

12 episodes, approx 45 minutes each.

3 variables accounted for out of 5

Justice League (2001-04)

Seven heroes fighting as one unit, each bringing individual strengths and weaknesses, creating opportunities and anticipating reactions, kicking villainous ass in dramatic set-pieces that give way to relatable human drama is what made Justice League one of the best cartoons that I’ve ever seen, especially Season 2.

Quite often it’s the City of Metropolis under threat, but, while not explicitly stated, the War of the Worlds style attacks in the very first arc make it clear that the danger isn't just going to be of global origin, it’ll be intergalactic. The typical focuses are there, of course, such as the folly of those with power, the corruption of the weak-willed in the face of that same power, and the way in which good intentions ill-conceived can be catastrophic to all, but like the comic from which the show took its name the stories aren't unwilling to stray into surreal situations in its exploration of such things. JL is storytelling without constraints.

Superman and Batman will be the big draw for most people, but not all heroes have an active role in every episode. The writers were wise enough to know that specific character-centric episodes would suffer if someone who adds nothing of value to the story was shoehorned in for appearances' sake. Hawkgirl is somewhat underused in the early episodes, but they make up for it in spades as things go on and she develops into one of the most interesting of the seven.

Each personality is unique: Batman and Superman are similar to how they were in their respective series; Flash is impetuous; Green Lantern is tactical; Hawkgirl is hasty and combative; Jonn is resourceful; and Wonder Woman is inexperienced because, unlike in the comics, she’s new to the whole superhero thing, having left her home just prior to the team forming. Despite the differences and personality clashes, a mutual respect and well-placed trust binds them (and everyone who isn't Batman likes to laugh at the Dark Knight’s Mr Serious attitude).

What’s equally as exciting is that, with the exception of just one episode, every story is at least a two-parter! The one standalone is a Christmas episode that’s more entertaining than anything 'festive' has any right to be.

52 episodes, approx 22 minutes each, split over 2 seasons. The show changed name to 'Justice League Unlimited' the following year, but I consider it more of a sequel than a typical next season, so it's not included here.

5 chest-emblems out of 5

GamesMaster (1992-98)

For the people that saw GamesMaster back in the day, that watched Dominick Diamond in his presenter pants talk straight-faced about waggling his joystick in public, the warm fuzzies of nostalgia that accompany this post are for you.

For everyone else, yes, the disembodied head in the picture above is the one and only astronomer extraordinaire Sir Patrick Moore. He was the godfather figure on the first ever dedicated video games show on UK TV.

GM went to places that other shows didn't. It plumbed the furrows and poked the holes. It even reached around without being asked because it cared. It was dangerous. In truth it was nothing more than innuendo, but if your mother walked in at the wrong time she’d be outraged. That just made it better!

As an adult now, I can see how Dom’s “verbose vernacular” could be perceived inappropriate and occasionally borderline pornographic by the emotionally stunted, but it didn't stop me chuckling the same all over again.

Dom left after Series II and was replaced by Dexter Fletcher, who was arrogant and shouty. It was a disaster. That’s all I have to say about Series III.

Mercifully, Dom returned for Series IV - VII. The innuendo was slightly curtailed, but the elevated icy sarcasm more than compensated. It’s as if he thought ‘I don’t give a toss about decorum or Channel 4. If they sack me, I’ll go out a winner.’ He'd perv the ladies and ridicule the men equally. The weekly mocking of Dave Perry, an act Dave seemed unaware of for the longest time, was pure gold.

Commentators and reviewers were from popular games magazines of the time, such as C+VG, Game Zone and my favourite, the one my paper round money paid for, Mean Machines. They dished out ridiculous scores of 80 and 90% for games we found out were turds when we rented them illegally from the unscrupulous but enterprising video store owner at the arse-end of town. Every town had one.

It was the era of the Mega Drive, SNES and Amiga; of Sensible Soccer, New Zealand Story, Alien Breed, and micro spring joysticks that broke about a week after purchase (but could we ever find that damn receipt?). Sonic 2, the slowed down PAL version, was a cutting edge new game! Bloody hell.

As the years went on the fast-loading, cartridge-based systems were forced into retirement as a cocky newcomer, the optical disc, arrived and seductively stroked the pockets of gamers the world over hungry for innovation. Little did we know it would lead to draconian business practices, patches, DLC and Season Passes.

126 episodes, approx 25 minutes each.

4 tight right-handers out of 5

Legit (2014)

Jimmy's on a bad luck run, yo.

Season 2 picks up mostly where season 1 left off. Jim has lost his girlfriend Peggy, fired from a lucrative acting gig after making the lead actress uncomfortable with a rape joke and then is possibly diagnosed with a sex addiction by Dr. Drew after he drops his phone in the toilet while using it to masturbate in the shower. Steve is spiraling out of control as well with a growing alcohol addiction and frequent drug fueled binges that threaten his already strained relationship with his ex-wife and young daughter. Billy deals with the progression of his muscular dystrophy and while Jim resolves to dig himself out of their ruts, they all have varying degrees of success. Jim tries therapy, charitable shows for the disabled and veterans, and reconnecting with old flames, but they don't always work out either because of bad luck or just his crass nature. They will also test his resolve and possibly threaten his career.

The season is the same as the first with hilariously black comedic plots often pulled verbatim from Jefferies' stand-up routines, but adds a bit more dark themes that he is also somewhat familiar with like addictions toll on loved ones and depression. The show might seem to lose some of its comedy, but becomes better with the stark mixed with the hilarious. The season was just full of the hilariously raunchy jokes like the thin walls during a happy ending massage or Jim falling for a supposedly perfect woman except for being incredibly racist. It really seemed to hit a stride which is too bad that it was moved to the obscure spin-off channel FXX where no one watched and was cancelled at the end of this season. At least it had some resolution and went out on a high note.

Buyer's Guide:
Available on iTunes and Amazon Instant video.

4 binges ending on the beach in your undies with no recollection out of 5

Batman Beyond: Complete Series (1999-2001)

aka Batman of the Future

The team that created Batman Beyond achieved the near-impossible: they made a show that's the equal of Batman: The Animated Series (1992-95) and they did it without having Bruce Wayne as the lead! Holy Personnel Changes, Batman.

It's set in 2039, forty years after TAS' successor, The New Batman Adventures (1997-97), and continues the continuity set up by both it and TAS. The era of the original crusader has passed. The world has moved on. Gotham has evolved into Neo-Gotham, a towering, high-tech megalopolis wherein the crime and corruption is as rife in the shiny office buildings as it is on the late night docks. Bruce (Kevin Conroy) is still around, possibly because, like one of his contemporaries said, he's too stubborn to die. He is, however, a retired, cranky and cynical recluse that rarely leaves the Manor.

Enter Terry McGinnis (Will Friedle), a seventeen-year-old high school student with a criminal record. Terry has the kind of family upbringing that was denied Bruce, but they have something in common nonetheless: they share a similarly strong moral belief and a desire to see justice carried out. When Terry takes up the mantle he becomes both the symbol that teaches and the student. Bruce, through a two way communication device in the new bat suit, gives advice and support, but it's Terry that takes the weight (and the punches and kicks, etc).

The show references the past in many ways. One of which is the biker gang that terrorises the city and its citizens. They're like a cross between the typical garden variety thug and the Clowns from Akira (1988). They're the painted-faced Jokerz, styled after the original Joker that caused Bruce grief decades before.*

It'll occasionally go further and build an entire episode around something from the past, but never as a means to milk old glories or hide failings. Instead, it's a knowing nod to TAS fans, because BB stands firm on its own two (rocket) feet.

Alongside the criminal of the week it introduces a new roster of regular villains and madmen, some more memorable than others. My personal favourites are the tricky Spellbinder (Jon Cypher), the mysterious Inque (Shannon Kenny), and the clumsy but dangerous anarchist Mad Stan (Henry Rollins).

52 episodes, approx 22 minutes each, split over 3 seasons.

5 critical lifesaving clues out of 5

*There's a feature length entry titled Return of the Joker (2000) that's a must-see for fans of both BB and TAS. If possible seek out the uncut version.

The A-Team: The Complete Series (1983–87)

I was reminded recently that the question, "Why do you watch that crap?" makes me less inclined to validate the reasons for my own choices and instead more aware of the hidden agenda of the person asking it. It's not a genuine inquiry. It's a thinly disguised insult. With that in mind, I feel sorry for anyone who didn't have The A-Team in their front room as a kid. Not having Sergeant First Class 'B.A.' Baracus, Colonel John 'Hannibal' Smith, Lieutenant Templeton 'Face' Peck and Captain 'Howling Mad' Murdock to provide escapism and feed the imagination is like having an integral part of a happy childhood denied you. It's like having never played with LEGO. It's like having never tasted strawberry sherbets in summer.

Being a fan of The A-Team was a privilege; one that was available to every sighted person who owned a working TV, whether it was the rich kid with a silver spoon feeding both ends simultaneously, or the ostracised, abused kid with an alcoholic father whom everyone thought was destined to be the same.

The show taught us that with good friends and a little ingenuity we could stand up to the bullies. (It made me want friends that I could rely on as much as the team relied on each other. I don’t know if I ever had them. I like to think that I had.)

It taught us that money isn't important to happiness, which was the opposite of what most corporate 80s TV programs wanted us to think, and it repeatedly showed that a selfless good deed is its own reward.

It taught us that Hannibal loves it when a plan comes together.

It taught us that villains will always get up afterwards with nothing more serious than dizziness and a bruised ego. But that part was a lie. In so doing, whether intentional or not, that same lie taught us that real life wasn't always like TV.

In the past year I've thought more than a dozen times that whichever post I'm working on at the time is the last one I'm making on this particular site, but I keep coming back. It's now clear to me why: I want to give all the people who get asked "Why do you watch that crap?" an incentive to revisit the reasons why they did watch it and to remember what it was that they gained from doing so. If you love something, scream it from the rooftops.

(What you're reading isn't the kind of review I was expecting to write when I sat down. I'd planned some jokes about B.A.'s bad acting, Hannibal's bad disguises, Murdock's tee-shirts, Face's shameless sexism and how in a pinch the team could build a tank from an egg box, but you've heard all those jokes before. This way, when the time comes for me to ride off into the sunset, I'll be entirely satisfied.)

98 episodes (5 Seasons), approx 47 minutes each, split over 27 discs.

5 wheel cams out of 5

Titus Seasons 1 & 2 (2000-2001)

"The Los Angeles Times states "63% of American families are now considered dysfunctional." That means we're the majority. We're normal. It's the people that had the mom, dad, brother, sister, little white picket fence, those people are the freaks."

Christopher Titus comes from a family that would be considered "dysfunctional". The half hour episodes would open with Titus in a black and white room talking directly to the audience and often relay some quote or story that is thematically part of the plot of the episode which are pulled almost verbatim from his one man comedy show Normal Rockwell Is Bleeding which was itself based on his real life. He grew up with his father who was a hard drinking, smoking, womanizing, 5-time divorcee who perpetually berates and belittles Titus and his idiot, stoner brother Dave in what he sees as a tough love approach to parenting. His mother was a violent, alcoholic, manic-depressive schizophrenic who was in and out of mental hospitals. As an adult he now runs his own hot-rod body shop with his brother and his best friend Tommy who is anxious and effeminate, which means he is constantly the butt of gay jokes despite being heterosexual. Titus is often only managing this craziness with the help of his girlfriend, Erin, who also comes from a dysfunctional family of alcoholic thieves and drug dealers, but has managed to grow into a somewhat normal person. The episodes would then end in the black and white "neutral space" where Titus would reiterate what he said before but now with the meaning skewed and turned on its side.

The show would often take on subject matter that other shows would fear to tread except in a special episode with a viewer discretion disclaimer. Titus would revel in it and crack fun at them while still treating the subject matter with respect whether it was sexual harassment, substance abuse, murder, suicide, etc. This puts the show squarely in the section of black comedy and it was actually part of the show's downfall. The battle with censors and the network over content was constant with Titus relaying one story about how he had to read the script for an episode page by page to an executive on the phone to convince him how it could be funny that they have to convince his father to resume drinking rather than quit because sobriety made him boring and listless. The shows were also different in shooting style as it was shot in real time in front of a studio audience on a set like a play usually in just one location. The laugh track is actually the audience members. Flashbacks and the neutral space interruptions were also played for the audience so it was seen almost exactly as it would be on air. Episodes were mostly self-contained with no overarching story with only a few bits of continuity which was only really thrown out of whack when the network would push episodes out of order for fear of its controversial plot. With its mostly untread material on network TV, its sharp and witty comedic timing and very non politically correct characters, there was nothing quite like it at the time. While it may feel a little dated now, the show still holds up on repeat viewings.

Buyer's Guide:
The DVD sets are now out of print and only available second hand which is a shame as this would be perfect for binge viewing on Netflix or other streaming service. There is a decent amount of bonus content on the discs if one does manage to grab a set.

4½ Don't be a wussy out of 5

The Royle Family: The Complete Collection (2013)

A fly on the wall style comedy about a stereotypical Manchester family who spend their lives on the sofa watching crap on television. They’re average Joes; common as shit, with a sideboard full of useless tatt and a TV remote held together with some quick-fix insulating tape. Until you warm to the flawed characters, or recognise something of your own family in them, it’s hard to see how it could possibly be entertaining. It may take more than one episode for that to happen. Waiting a week for one instalment is the worst way to experience anything episodic, but happily the series has ended, so you can binge.

The head of the family, Jim Royle (Ricky Tomlinson), is the star. His every second outburst is some kind of sarcastic, critical reproach or joke at someone else’s expense. When not making friends that way, he’s scratching himself or picking his nose. Jim unashamedly does all the things publicly that most men do privately (expect that!). There’s a little bit of Jim in everyone.

His long-suffering wife Barbara (Sue Johnston) is cook and cleaner. She likes to gossip but has a heart of gold beneath the outer shell. Somehow she and Jim mustered up the enthusiasm to have two children: twenty-something layabout Denise (Caroline Aherne) and her dogsbody brother Anthony (Ralf Little). He gets less screen time than the others, but he’s my second favourite character.

Outside of the core family, a small number of friends and neighbours pop in when they need something. It’s a small cast but you’ll be hard-pressed to find a better written set of characters in a sitcom. They share mannerisms and exhibit inherited traits like a real family who spend all their time together would.

In the three years that the weekly show ran, the camera never left the house interior. We were given glimpses of the outside world but it wasn't until the specials came along that the exterior was explored. When it happens that first time, have your hankies at the ready because it’s one of the most unforgettable and emotionally powerful TV moments I've ever witnessed. Really.

20 episodes, most of which are approx 30 minutes each, and 5 specials that run longer. Everything up to and including the 2006 special is quality, but everything afterwards was less successful. There was an attempt to wed absurdest comedy into the mix, which really didn't work.

3½ bacon-butties (made by Anthony) out of 5

Pramface (2013)

We're not in a relationship. We're barely even mates. 
We're just two people who had a kid.

Series 2 begins with Jamie and Laura now dealing with the trials and tribulations of being new parents. Jamie must juggle schoolwork, a job and parenting while Laura feels isolated and ignored by anyone she might be able to even converse with. Both suffer judgement and shame from strangers and even family while mostly tolerating each other. The series becomes more of an ensemble this season as the large cast of supporting characters get much more screentime and plotlines of their own. It was only a problem in that the supporting characters were often much more interesting than the leads. Mike continues his never-ending quest to lose his virginity while Beth sabotages him at every juncture and the various grandparents manage unemployment and rough spots in their respective marriages.

While the two leads are a bit overshadowed, they are by no means bad. It is deliciously wonderful to watch them awkwardly fumble around each other. Jamie tries his hand at dating and Laura trying to make adult friends are particularly cute, but the nature of the situation always comes around like in the quote above. Though it never veers to serious. Whenever it moves close to that line, the mood will be lightened by Mike doing something idiotic or Laura's father Alan will be quirkily doing something weird because of his recent head trauma. Still a decently watchable show, even more so if you like the rest of the cast.

Buyer's Guide:
Available for US audiences on HULU.

3½ Magic Mushrooms out of 5

Star Trek: The Next Generation: Season 2 (1988-89)

Season Two took the formula that had been suitably refined by the end of Season One and shook it up a little. Not straight away, the majority of it follows the same safely laid path, but as it nears the end a dangerous element that upsets the equilibrium is introduced. The Federation’s sense of superiority (that they’d never openly admit to having) is challenged and, much to Picard’s disdain, ideologies need adjusted. It’s no longer just about exploration.

There were some new additions to the crew roster. Two of them are significant for different reasons, although technically they can both be called healers.

The first is Commander Katherine Pulaski who replaced Beverly Crusher as the ship’s Chief Medical Officer. Pulaski appears to be modelled on TOS’s Dr McCoy but they never go so far as to have her say the famous line.

The second is Guinan, who becomes a semi-regular fountain of wisdom for young and old, ensign and captain, etc. She gets used in a very specific way that anyone who has studied literature will recognise instantly, but her warmth and one-on-one tactics are a welcome departure from the Conference Room.

There are a few episodes that misfire completely but Season Two also contains some of my personal favourites:

-Measure of a Man: a Data-centric story that tests the loyalties and pride of more than one key member of the crew and offers up some palatable philosophical questions for the viewer.

-The Royale: It’s not a standout episode for any specific reason and the sets are cheap, but it feels like a short story from the golden era of sci-fi. It takes elements from other genres and uses them in a new way and by doing so it shows the versatility of ideas and proves that sci-fi truly has zero limitations.

Without a doubt the best thing about S2 is that Commander Riker grew a manly beard. His smug grin is better suited to having hair surround it.

22 episodes, approx 44 minutes each.

4 games of chance out of 5

Masters of Horror: Series Two: Volume Two (2006)

The second volume of Series Two contains the final six episodes. Once again, there may be a difference in running order between the R1 and R2 editions. I'm using the UK R2 editions. NA also got a full season box that included both volumes.

To start, Tom Holland directs a tale of a group of aged friends who did something morally wicked in their younger days and are now paying the price. It has a creepy ice cream van driven by a clown, for extra clichéd woefulness. — 1½ out of 5 —

The second is by Brad Anderson; it raises the bar of quality, It's about a supervisor at a tech support call centre (Chris Bauer) who, due to a personal tragedy, has an acute sense of hearing that turns everyday sounds into a kind of nails-on-blackboard agony. Anderson's taught style translates the pains of grief and pressure of life into elevated minutiae to a troubled mind; and like in Poe's Tell-tale Heart, the device functions as a fully engaging driving force. — 3 out of 5 —

The third is by Peter Medek. It's a story that relies on a clear subversion of expectations, both in its opening scene and its main underlying contrivance that suggests a treasured American historical figure was less perfect than public records claim. The 'creepy old-timer' shtick served more than one purpose, but was so overplayed that it failed to elevate the narrative much. Scholars of US history might get some jollies from the notion, I suppose. — 2 out of 5 —

The fourth is by Dir. Tobe Hooper. Tobe is undeniably skilled at establishing unease, but, for me personally, the intentionally messy camerawork works against it, blurring the nuance and pulling me out of the moment. If you feel the reverse is true, however, then TDT might register high on your list because an impressive level of foreboding tension exists beneath that stylistic choice. — 3 out of 5 —

The fifth is Dir. Norio Tsuruta's Dream Cruise, based on a short story by Kôji Suzuki, who's best known in filmic circles as the author of the works that Hideo Nakata's Dark Water (2002) and Ring (1998) films were based on. Dream Cruise, as you've probably guessed, also involves water. The weak framing, stupid plotting, overplayed sound effects, shit acting, lack of music, and reliance on Japanese horror clichés make it an utter washout.  — 1 out of 5 —

And finally, Dir. Ernest Roscoe Dickerson's entry sees two thrill-seeking late-teens visit a funeral home to see a dead body, late at night, naturally, when it's at its most creep-some. The location is used well and the black humour is fun for a time, but I did lose interest before the ending rolled around. (It's perhaps worth noting that I had an audio dropout around the 33 mins mark, during the pizza scene; I don't know if it's unique to my disc or the UK collection, in general.) — 1½ out of 5 —

I wanted a change from the horror genre after watching all of those, so I didn't bother with any of the extras on the second volume. The blurb states there are more than 10 hours of them.

6 episodes approx 55 minutes each (345 minutes total), split over 6 discs.

2 pizza slices out of 5

Mortal Kombat: Legacy II (2013)

The second collection of shorts in the MK anthology has more of a serialised structure than the character-centric vignettes of Series 1. Each story is split over 2 episodes this time, which are in turn part of a larger whole connected by a very specific locale. The contrast between past and present becomes a kind of running theme, while offering up some back story for certain characters.

It starts well. Episode 1 is like a violent HK movie. It doesn't have much of a plot, but focuses instead on showing Liu Kang’s relationship with the world he swore to protect and the one he left behind. It’s like an intro more than anything else, but that’s okay because all episodes have been simultaneously released for stream, so you don’t have to wait from week to week to get your fix.

The quality drops significantly in the middle, with some poor acting from the ladies, but see it through to the end and you’ll be rewarded with some Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa. There are a couple of other interesting guest stars, too.

Each episode of Series One had its own visual look, but things are more or less standardised throughout this time. The lighting that Tancharoen or his DP has opted for puts more emphasis on gritty realism than before. It’s certainly a more unified visual experience but consequently a less interesting one if, like me, you happened to like the fanciful parts of Series One.

10 episodes, approx 7 - 9 mins each (some are shorter, some are longer).

2½ ideals worth defending out of 5

Jonathan Creek: Series I, II and III (1997 - 2000)

Jonathan Creek is a mystery/detective series, but Jonathan (Alan Davies) isn't an actual detective. He designs magic tricks for a stage magician. His knowledge of stage magic, or more precisely his understanding of what it takes to create the perfect illusion, enables him to take available clues from a crime scene and work backwards. He assesses the impossible without ever dismissing the implausible. The show is less of a traditional 'whodunnit', and more of a 'howdunnit' that keeps you guessing right up to the inevitable reveal.

It's not all death and murder, though. There's a lot of comedy, too; much of which revolves around Jonathan's relationship with his partner in crime-solving, the female writer/investigative reporter, Maddie Magellan (Caroline Quentin). He's the reserved, quiet sort, whereas she's the bold, outgoing kind. As the show progresses their relationship deepens and they spend more and more time under each other's feet, and on each other's couch.

An ongoing sexual tension would be too much of a cliché. Instead, Maddie just wants to bang Jonathan to within an inch of his nerdy life. It's not because he's dashingly handsome - it's because she likes a challenge, too.

I'm not suggesting the show is free of clichés, because it isn't. The murder in a locked room scenario pops up often and becomes a kind of running joke. It even relies on a few others of its own making.

Every great detective needs an equally great theme tune to set the mood for what follows. Creek doesn't disappoint. It uses a slightly more fickle arrangement of French composer Camille Saint-Saëns' wonderful Danse Macabre. It's the perfect accompaniment to the show's clever but equally fatuous nature.

Stick around after the credits roll on the pilot for a scene that isn't important to the murder story but is relevant to something else.

S1: Pilot approx 90 mins + 5 episodes approx 60 mins each.

S2: 6 episodes, approx 50 mins each. | S3: 6 episodes, approx 50 mins each.

4½ slow drips out of 5

Blackadder II (1986)

After the disappointing first series, I'm surprised that Blackadder II ever got the green light, but it did and I'm very glad. Ben Elton joined Richard Curtis on writing duties, which helped matters considerably. Ben was no stranger to cheap alternative comedy having worked on The Young Ones a few years before. The BBC put restrictions on the production, but the two men managed to turn them to their advantage.

It's set in England during the Elizabethan era (1558–1603). The new Blackadder is a descendent of the original Black Adder. That means he can have different characteristics and a different personality. Elizabethan Edmund is a lot more confident and much less of a wet handkerchief. He also has to be more cunning because he's still attached to the Royal Court, and the Queen will have his head if she finds out about his antics. She's impulsive like that.

Both Percy (Tim McInnerny) and Baldrick (Tony Robinson) returned, but there was no Brian Blessed (Boo!). His absence was softened by having some new cast members who brought a new dynamic to the show.

Miranda Richardson played Queen Elizabeth. For two decades now whenever someone mentions Queen Elizabeth she’s the first thing I think of.

The Lord Chamberlain, Melchett, is played by the awesome Stephen Fry.

Patsy Byrne played the bewildering Nursie, the Queen's former nanny.

And finally, cameos from a small number of other famous British comedians kept things interesting. You'll find out who they were if (or when) you watch it.

6 episodes, approx 30 minutes each.

3½ devil's dumplings out of 5

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: The Complete Series (2002)

Wisely taking into account how badly The New Adventures of He-Man (1990) was received, Mattel tried a second MOTU reboot in 2002 with designs that were less of a departure from the original 1983-85 series. Characters and locations were updated but remained instantly recognisable.  The opening title sequence sets the tone perfectly; it references the old series and then cleverly and effortlessly lets you know in no uncertain terms that this one is new.

The rebuilding of the franchise is mirrored in the gradual rebuilding of King Randor’s Kingdom. The threat of Skeletor necessitates that it be fortified and that loyal subjects are recruited to defend it, meaning the core team members return.

Man-At-Arms is his usual dependable self, with a bad-ass 'tache that will surely go down in legend. Teela is more combative but still resolutely feminine. Orko is less irritating, and is occasionally kind of useful. Stratos gets more to do, all the while sounding like the lovechild of Sean Connery and Brian Blessed. The remainder of the team each have a unique talent that the writers play around with to make their inclusion worthwhile, but special mention goes to the Sorceress who is beautifully characterised by her strength and compassion.

He-Man’s musculature is slightly less bloated; he’s not as much of a top-heavy freak as he was before. Aesthetically he’s fine, but there's one major problem with the character: Cam Clarke’s voice work. He does okay as He-Man, but as Adam he makes no effort whatsoever. I'm seeing the young Prince but I'm hearing Leonardo the Ninja Turtle. It’s the only weak aspect of the show.

Skeletor was always the best thing, so I'm happy to report that despite lacking his trademark 'Nyyaaahh' he’s even more awesome and a lot more menacing than his 1980's counterpart. He no longer flees at the first flex of He-Man’s chest; he’ll stand and fight instead. His frustrations are worked out by punishing his minions, which provides some comedy without compromising his new status.
Not having Evil-Lyn at his side would feel wrong, so she’s included. She essentially serves the same purpose as before, but is a little more Maleficent with a pinch of Lady Macbeth (she even casts spells in rhyme).

Combat is exciting, with an anime-style visual flair that settles down over time but never falls away completely. There’s some attempt to add depth to the animation through shadows that doesn't always work but deserves praise for being tried.

Season 1 is really great, but Season 2 raises the bar even higher by adding an additional threat that would've been more prominent in Season 3 had it not been cancelled because of floundering toy sales. Curse you, Matty. I want more!

39 episodes (26 in S1 + 13 in S2) split over 4 discs.

4½ morals at the end out of 5